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May 2005 - Ask Kim Column
Dear Kim:
I have recently lost my mother and she was my rock. Since she has passed, my family is urging me to abandon my consultant business and go find a "real" job that is 9 to 5. My problem is that I really like what I do, but I am not making enough money to pay my bills. I have asked my largest client for an increase in fees. Are they going to increase my fees? I am also trying to write a children's book and I hope to get it published. What should I do?
Andrea D., 35
Chicago, Illinois
Dear Andrea:
I'm so sorry about the passing of your mother! You both have moved on to different chapters of your lives. Your mother is building a new life in heaven---and you are in the process of creating a new life on earth.
To be frank, your consulting business is dying on the vine and you will not be able to support yourself because your clients will not allow you to increase their fees. It's time to get a job in which you still have some freedom with your schedule and can do some of your work at home---like outside sales. You'll have a salary, plus commission, and that financial security will allow you independence from your family, and the creative energy to follow your dream of getting published. You'll find your new job in the want ads of the Chicago Tribune.
Once you have secured the job, then it's time to set your alarm for 5:00am every morning so that you have the necessary writing time to finish the children's book. You can do it! And---no disrespect to your family---but if they're not contributing to you financially, then the choices you make are truly none of their business. You're going to be much happier when you don't have to answer to them or explain your decisions. Please let me know about your future book signings. I'd love to come!
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Dear Kim:
I've been in an intimate relationship with a married man for almost 11 years. We love each other very deeply and we support each other as best we can. He won't leave his wife and I accept his reasons. We feel we are soul mates but I'm feeling that maybe we weren't supposed to be together as a couple should be. I don't believe I would have chosen to endure such a situation in this lifetime. So is he my Mr. Wonderful or is there someone else?
M.D., 47
Toronto, Canada
Dear M.D.:
I appreciate you mustering the courage to ask about a man who is as important to you as your current sweetie. However, he is NOT a Mr. Wonderful. It is time to move on and explore other romantic opportunities. As long as you are tied to this man, you'll never have room in your heart for anyone else.
He will never, EVER, be available to you--so you are truly wasting your time. Not only is he unavailable legally because he is married---but he isn't available emotionally either, or he wouldn't have maneuvered back and forth between you and his wife for 11 years! If he were emotionally available, he would stop making excuses and get out of his dissatisfying marriage. Instead, he declares his undying love while enjoying you sexually; and then conveniently puts you back on the shelf when he returns home to his wife. He isn't being truthful or loyal to her, and he isn't being truthful or loyal to you! Soul mate, my foot! If you don't believe that you would have chosen to endure such a situation in this lifetime, then why are you? It's your choice! Move on!
Find a man who will be all yours; and one you can trust, and find peace, true love, and security with! You just have to decide on the quality of life that you want. And you need to ask yourself: why have you been willing to allow the situation to continue for so long? Are you emotionally available? Happily, I can tell you that your Mr. Wonderful will appear on the scene about a year after you break up with your current beau. If you can muster the courage to move on with your life, you have some blissful days ahead!
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Dear Kim:
My job is not really what I want it to be; they are going through a restructuring phase and we are all worried. Should I stick it out? Take a leap and leave before finding another job? Stay in Texas? I have a project I have been trying to get going for a long time and wonder if it will ever be recognized and bring me money to help support myself?
Bren K., 43
Austin, Texas
Dear Bren:
Your company isn't the only one going through a restructuring! You are too---and this is an excellent time to ask all of these questions! You have no security at your current job so you are correct in guessing that it is time to look elsewhere. And you need to do so NOW. Right now!
Your guides do not recommend that you quit your existing job until you secure the new one because you can't afford any down time financially. Look for the new job in the Austin area because you're going to stay there for another ten years. And, by the way, the project that you asked about is going to be very successful---but it's time to quit talking about it and get working at it on a daily basis, and you'll make it a reality! It's your destiny!
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Would you like Kim to answer a question for you in her column? Please write or email your question, including your name and age. If you'd like information about a private session, you can contact Kim at 281-651-1599, or through our Contact Form.
Kim O'Neill
4008 Louetta Rd
#362
Spring, Texas 77388
kim@kimoneillpsychic.com
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